Strongly Worded

Rage Against the USPS

OK, so you all know I have a really hard time with the pernicious effects of the celebration of Christmas (note that I don't have a problem with the actual holiday). While some of it stems from being Jewish and feeling put out by the constant onslaught of songs, sales, greetings, and decorations for a holiday I do not celebrate, I think most of it stems from the fact that the aforementioned songs, sales, greetings, and decorations are fucking everywhere, preventing anyone, of any religion, from forgetting for one single second that 'tis the season. And the season feels endless, since Jack Frost starts nipping right after Halloween.

I will not get into my many, many issues with this season, which include, but are not limited to, commercialism, pressure/stress, and false goodwill, not to mention the recent "defense of Christmas" horror that has surfaced lately. But I will, for your reading pleasure, discuss the latest outrage, which occurred recently at the post office.

I went to the post office to mail a package (for a friend) and buy stamps ( for work). Of course there was a huge line, but I cozied up to the automated postage machine, which I love. I weighed and sent the package, then paid for the stamps. Three booklets slid out of the slot, featuring smiling Santas.

When I complained to the "attendant" (the guy stationed next to the automated machine--oh, OK), he pointed to the sign above the machine, which depicted St. Nick alongside the phrase "Now Available". I didn't even notice the sign, but even if I had, to me "available" does not mean "non negotiable." No way in hell is my organization sending out mail with Santa stamps. Not only is it unprofessional, but it is inappropriate. I told the attendant this, my outrage mounting.

He sent me to the long line snaking towards the counter, in which, out of principle (and again, mounting outrage), I stood until I got to the cashier. The cashier refused to exchange the Santa stamps for normal ones. The manager (you bet I talked to the manager) concurred that he couldn't exchange them, since they were from the automated machine and have a different code .. blah blah.

He didn't care that I told him that, as a Jew, I would never, ever send mail with those stamps, and that, anyway, they were for my job at a secular organization that accepts government funding (not sure if that matters, since USPS is a governmental agency, too, I think).

I should have made an announcement (aka scene) and try to sell the stamps to some Christian waiting in line, and then bought normal stamps. Alas, I was too mad. I stalked out.

This little transaction exemplifies everything I hate about the way Christmas is celebrated. The assumption is that everyone wants Santa stamps--and not only do they want them, but they will have them, damn it, because that's all that's available if you don't stand in a long line and articulate otherwise. If I went to a clothing store and unwittingly bought a sweater with Jesus on it, they sure as hell would let me exchange it for a plain one. Or even give me cash back.

So. I'm putting three booklets of Santa Stamps up for grabs. Any takers?

Posted by Dori at 3:49 PM