Strongly Worded

An Open Letter to Netflix

Listen up, Netflix.

Because of you, I sound educated and cultured, allowing me to cite references to "that documentary I saw on Indian prostitutes/Indian lesbians/Scrabble-obsessed people/Nazi-Germany Jewish swimmers".

Because of you, I can watch films such as Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, without the judgmental stare of the too-cool-for-thou cashier at Hollywood Express.

Because of you, I can devour entire seasons of commercial-free reality TV, eliminating week-to-week suspense because I can watch four hours at a time.

But Netflix! Enough with the email! When I check my account and it announces "two new messages", my heart surges. Perhaps it's the man of my dreams finally following up on the nudge of fate! Maybe an amazing job offer that will catapault me into homeownership! OR, the first of thousands of comments on my newly dooce-caliber blog!

So I click on inbox. And I flinch. It's just you, reliable, informative you, with your automated confirmation of the receipt of the latest DVD and the shipment of the next one.

Posted by Dori at 9:51 AM