Strongly Worded

The Progressive Taste of Revenge

So tomorrow is moving day, and I've been plotting what kind of goodies to leave for my evil racist landlords. I considered putting some potatoes behind their washing machine, which will eventually start to rot and emit hideous odors. I snicker to myself when I imagine the landlords sniffing around everywhere, trying to find the source, and then yelling at each other, laying blame.

I am too nervous to do that. I'm worried they would figure out it was me, or they'd catch me in their laundry area with the potatoes.

I couldn't think of an alternative idea that wouldn't be too mean or end up hurting the hapless future tenant.

But then on Friday night, my brilliant friends came up with the perfect solution. I will make donations on my landlords' behalf. Thanks to my own generosity, those conservative, small-minded, greedy, and racist people will receive a flurry of thank you letters from Planned Parenthood, MassNARAL, the NAACP, and the Freedom to Marry Coalition. Then they will receive a deluge of action alerts and follow-up solicitations, since the aforementioned organizations will surely want to stay connected to their generous donors, donors so committed to their missions that in fact they'll surely enjoy getting solicitations from other progressive groups with whom they share mailing lists. [Evil chuckle.]

Also! A Good Vibrations catalog is on the way to Mr. & Mrs. Racist, soon to be followed by one from Babeland ...

Posted by Dori at 11:40 AM