Strongly Worded

Hear Me Roar!

I am stunned to report that I may become known as Professor Dori within the next few months. My wonderful friend K., who is a doctoral candidate at State University, recently forwarded me an announcement about a gig: teaching an online class on women's leadership. I couldn't fathom the possibility that an institution of higher learning would actually hire me to teach said course, because I live in New England, where the streets seethe with Ph.Ds. But I thought, what the hell? It's a boring day at work. I'm a woman. I'm a director.

I emailed my resume to the department chair, with nary a cover letter. I just wrote: "I'm writing to express my interest in the teaching job, and if you think my experience is relevant, I'll be glad to send you a formal application." She responded quickly and we set up a phone interview (this University is far from here--more than an hour away). I researched online learning and prepared to talk about why she should hire me despite my nonexistent experience with web-based instruction, women's studies, and teaching at the college level.

These topics never came up, and she seemed satisfied with my credentials despite the fact that we've never met. She apologized for the paltry compensation (admittedly not a lot of money for the work involved, but hey, it's college teaching experience! This could open doors! Seriously, I'd have done it for free!). Before even calling my reference, she asked me to develop a flier publicizing the class.

Beacuse the class will be cancelled if fewer than 9 students enroll, I spent a long time on this flier. I'm trying to attract the slothful, cell-phone-toting, MySpace-ing members of Generation Y (or are we on Gen Z by now?), described in unflattering terms both by K. and Teacher Lady. I was rocking Google Images for pictures of women leaders, and found nothing appropriate, so I sucked it up and trolled the tacky-fest that is Microsoft Clip Art. When you search for "leader", you get a whole slew of images (including pictures of the Pope, the Founding Fathers, and the Sphinx). No women other than Susan B. Anthony and Cleopatra appear. Same for "business". When I typed it in I got all these pictures of briefcases, conference tables, and MEN at podiums, MEN at the helms of ships, and MEN shaking hands with one another. The chicks were either completely absent, following men in disempowering ways (see picture), or dating their co-workers (see other picture).

I finally found a somewhat acceptable image (still a little too sexy-secretary looking, but whatever), and slapped it on the flier with the words ONLINE COURSE in big huge bold letters, trying to convey that students should definitely register for the class because they won't have to leave the air-conditioned comfort of their homes.

I really hope they sign up (and now I check enrollment multiple times a day; it's like waiting for a boy to call), because maybe at least one of them will become a graphic design mogul, and shake up the deplorably sexist world of clip art.

Posted by Dori at 6:57 PM